By Robyn L. Coburn
July 30, 2004
unschoolingbasics email list
<<<At the same time,
she avoids any kind of language arts activities.>>>
This is school speak. Do you
mean that your daughter doesn't speak or listen or engage in conversations or
watch movies or listen to the lyrics of songs or talk on the phone or express
her opinions or draw pictures which have a story to them or tell you stories or
listen to you reading to her or ask questions.....?
Of course she likely does
most or all of these things. I mention all this because I strongly suspect that
you are separating educational activities
from life, and thinking in
terms of school subjects and some on paper method of proving that your dd has learnt some skill - outside of living it. A journey towards Unschooling means
letting go of these limiting definitions.
<<<We've been
through vision therapy, so the physical issues she had that made reading and
writing difficult are resolved, but she still doesn't like those activities.
>>>
Trying to force whatever
these activities are on her in even a gentle way shows her that you have an
agenda for her learning timetable.
Worse, it continues to reinforce that she has some kind of lack in your
eyes. You are defining her in terms of
her difficulties by seeking to address them specifically.
<<<My biggest
concern with a less structured approach to homeschooling is that she'll never
learn to read or spell. There are so many ways to avoid those things --
books on tape, TV/videos, etc. that she could be very functional for a long
time without "needing" to read.>>>>
So exult and rejoice that she
can revel in the immense cultural offerings available to her, and know that she
will learn to read in her own time.
There was an article about
"late" readers on the www.unschooling.com website - recently featured -
something about "Now I can breathe again..."
When I read the phrase
"be very functional" I hear a parent who is still invested in schoolthink. It is so clinical sounding, and may be a
leftover
from the therapies that you
were part of. How about using the phrase "enjoy a lot of cool stuff"
instead?
<<<Any feedback
would be appreciated. If this topic of "how to be sure your child
will learn what s/he needs to learn" has been discussed recently, just
point me to the archives.>>>>
Unschooling is the only way that you can be *sure* that
your child learns what *they* need to learn, because that's kinda
the definition of it. All
they do all day is learn what
they *need* for the activities that interest them, sometimes asking for
assistance. I think you are mixing up what
*they really, genuinely,
individually need* with what school (the dominant ideology) tells you they need
- often spurious.
Unschooling helps my family live mindfully in the present,
without worrying about future *needs*. Two days ago Jayn
(4.75) wrote her name for the first time to sign a piece of artwork. Tonight
she suddenly recited our phone number - I didn't know she had ever heard it.
She is interested in being able to label her work, and she is also very
interested in telephones.
http://www.sandradodd.com/deschooling
The above is a link to Deschooling for Parents. It may help reassure you.
There have been threads on
writing and handwriting here and on UnschoolingDiscussion@yahoogroups.com
recently, since you mentioned
writing earlier.