By Danielle Conger
To: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
>>>Someday when my children are old enough
to understand the logic that motivates a parent, I will tell them, as my Mean
Mom told me: I loved you enough . . . to ask where you were going, with whom,
and what time you would be home. I loved you enough to be silent and let you
discover that your new best friend was a creep. I loved you enough to make you
go pay for the bubble gum you had taken and tell the clerk,
"I stole this yesterday and want to pay for it." I loved you enough
to stand over you for two hours while you cleaned your room, a job that should
have taken 15 minutes. I loved you enough to let you see anger, disappointment,
and tears in my eyes. Children must learn that their parents aren't perfect. I
loved you enough to let you assume the responsibility for your actions even
when the penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart. But most of all, I
loved you enough . . . to say NO, when I knew you would hate me for it. Those
were the most difficult battles of all. I'm glad I won them, because in the end
you won, too. And someday when your children are old enough to understand the
logic that motivates parents, you will tell them.
****************************************************
Just for kicks, I wanted to write this out as it would look
for me....
Someday, when my children are older, I will tell them:
I loved you enough to care about where you were going, with
whom, and what time you'd be home and to help you get there, have fun, and come
home.
I loved you enough to be silent when you needed me to be
silent and to be there when you needed to talk, to give you the space to
discover for yourself who your true friends were and to help you pick up the
pieces when you were hurt.
I loved you enough to help you pay for the bubble gum you
wanted and to make things right when they felt wrong.
I loved you enough to stand by you for a lifetime, to be by
your side for two hours while we cleaned your room, a job that would have taken
me 15 minutes, but the conversation was too precious to lose.
You learned that I wasn't perfect as we shared our lives
together.
I loved you enough to let you make choices even when the
stakes were high and to help bear your burden whenever I could.
But most of all, I loved you enough to always help you get
what you needed, to put our relationship first and to walk in your shoes
instead of engaging in battles.
I'm glad you came to me, because in the end, you've helped
me grow and become a better person, so I won, too, in this relationship.
And someday, when your children are old enough to understand
the principles that guide this legacy of parenting, I hope you tell them how
they helped you grow and become a better person.
--
~~Danielle
Emily (8), Julia (7), Sam (5)
http://www.danielleconger.com/Homeschool/Welcomehome.html